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Monday, January 30, 2012

Nevermind, I'll Find A Song Like You

I'm going out on a limb, here, but it needs to be said. So here goes:

Am I the only one who finds Adele's "Someone Like You" more than a little...creepy? And sort of...misguided?

Don't get me wrong, I love the damn song. Love. It. I can't not sing it when I hear it, though I will never be able to wail it the way Adele can. The woman's voice gives me goosebumps and the song is heartache and pain and love and loss and just plain beautiful in its misery.

But its creepy.

Think about it. An old flame shows up on your doorstep, years after you've broken up and says:

Hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited but I
Couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it
I'd hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me, it isn't over

Well. Alrighty, then.

Your ex shows up telling you they couldn't fight the urge to be there (even though you broke up years ago and are happily married to someone else) and they're also telling you it isn't over.

Cue the spooky Friday the 13th music.

If the ex is a man and you are a woman, you should be calling the police and telling them you may have a stalker situation. If the ex is a woman, congratulations, you have an unbalanced, cliched psycho ex-girlfriend, and you also might want to call the police if you think she's a threat. At the very least, you're going to be explaining to your wife why this crying woman suddenly showed up when you didn't invite her and why she seems to think you're still involved. Not a good scenario.

Then Adele moves on to wail about how she'll go on to find "someone like you". OK, I'll give her the benefit of the doubt and say the breakup must've been all her fault. It had to have been one-hundred percent her issues that were the problem and this guy had absolutely no differences, idiosyncrasies or issues of his own that contributed to the demise of their relationship. In that case, she would certainly be on the lookout for another wonderful soul who fit her in the same utterly perfect way that this guy did.

That's not very likely, is it? People change and people grow and people can sometimes turn out to be different than you thought they were in the beginning. It's just the way life works. Maybe he was a great guy overall, Adele, but you broke up for a reason. In all likelihood, you broke up for a list of reasons, some of which may still be valid. Why go back there again? Take what you learned and move on. If you truly "wish nothing but the best" for this guy, then you shouldn't be showing up on his doorstep to wail about how you're not over him and want to harvest a tissue sample in order to clone him in a laboratory.

Maybe I'm just too jaded from this "splitting up after building a life together" stuff. Or maybe the heartache in that song, the gut-wrenching feeling of loss is just too raw for me to hear without a cynical ear.

Nevermind, Adele. I'll find a song like yours. Hurry up and write one, will you?

Make it about a woman who runs into her ex and barely realizes it's him because she just plain didn't notice. She can smile and ask about his day in a polite, but disinterested way as she puts the last few things in her grocery cart for that great dinner she'll be cooking tonight for her friends. Or her new boyfriend. And when she says goodbye, she'll be glad he's doing well but not be the least bit interested in what he's doing and who he's doing it with. She has no time for that, because her life is full and bright and beautiful.

That's a song I can get behind. Sing it, sister.


  1. I can totally get behind a song like that :)

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